The Vocabulary of Touch: An Interview with Fritz FrederickSmith

Meridians: Fritz, you've said that if people were aware of thedifferent ways they use energy, they could have better relationships, communicatebetter, be better healers.

Fritz Smith: Yes, the more we learn about the movement of energy,the more choices we have when we interact with others. I like to describethe special characteristics of energy movement in terms of touch - I callthem the "vocabulary of touch." This "vocabulary" isused in Zero Balancingë (a method developed by Dr. Smith for aligningbody energy with body structure), and we can also use this vocabulary morebroadly - to reflect on the ways we habitually interact with others. Whenpeople see their personal patterns, they're often surprised.

Meridians: When you say "touch," are you referring tophysical touch?

Fritz Smith: Not necessarily. We can touch a person physicallyor energetically. Touch does not have to be physical. If you and I lookat each other across the room, for example, and we "connect' throughour eyes, we experience each other in ways beyond simply "seeing."In a sense, we touch each other. Our vibrations, our energy, connect (ortouch) - we have an energetic experience without a physical connection.

Meridians: Would psychotherapy be another example of touchingthe energy without touching the body?

Fritz Smith: It could - although I think of classical psychotherapyas more of an analytical, left-brain system rather than one involving energyconnection. Not every interchange between people is necessarily "energetic"in the sense I'm using it here. Talking about something with a therapistis different than when you feel something in yourself - or, in relationto another person, when you feel a movement between the two of you, feelsomething actually happening between you - that would be an energy movement.This is more likely to happen in any therapy when the therapist and/or theclient intends to create that connection.

Meridians: So we can touch energy without touching structure.Does it work the other way? Can we touch people's structure without touchingtheir energy?

Fritz Smith: Theoretically, when you touch structure you are alsotouching the energy. But, experientially, there's no question that you cantouch people's structure without contacting their energy. When you shakehands with somebody, for instance, sometimes you feel like you're shakinga wooden hand. The handshake gives you no sense of who the other personis - nothing of "him" or "her" is there. Or, in relationto massage, sometimes you come away from an hour-long session and feel thatthe massage missed what's essential about you, as though you have neverbeen touched. Or in acupuncture, how many times have we put a needle intothe structure but have missed the energy?

Meridians: Could people do better body work or acupuncture - bebetter therapists - if they understood how energies connect?

Fritz Smith: There is no question. We can affect both ourselvesand others in ways that aren't possible without this understanding.

In what I'm calling the "vocabulary of touch" there are fourpossible ways of connecting with others energetically: interfacing, blending,streaming, and channeling. As we talk about these different ways of interaction,or ways of being with one another, you'll notice we are speaking of boundaries- and the boundaries are different in each case.

With interface, the boundaries between two people are very clear. There'sno sense that the boundaries are merging. With interface, you know whereyour space ends and my space begins - where your body ends and my body begins.We're clear about who is responsible for what. You'll often see interfacein healthy work relationships: People are respectful of each other's boundaries;they give each other clear requests and clear answers.

With blending, some of our boundaries have merged and there's an areaof overlap. In the area where we've blended, neither person is sure whois who. And we aren't clear where responsibility or authorship lies or whathappens within that blended experience. Sometimes that blending is appropriateand natural - maybe we'll sing songs together, put an arm around each other,share something inspirational, just hang out - we blend our energy in ashared experience. And, at other times, it may not be appropriate. We mayget blended into another person's project or issues without realizing it- or they get taken into ours. We've lost our boundaries and we may beginto feel uncomfortable or used or depleted, and not understand why.

Meridians: But if we understand we're blending, we could changethe energy?

Fritz Smith: Exactly. If you realize that you are blending anddecide it isn't appropriate, you can reestablish your boundaries and containyour energy - interface rather than blend.

The third possibility is streaming in which energy passes from one personto another - one person is the giver, the other the receiver. Some peoplego through life habitually giving of themselves to other people, energeticallyand in every other way. Mothers may do this to children; husbands may givethis way to wives, or wives to husbands - it can go either way. One personis giving all the time.

At times, streaming has an advantage. But people who go through lifecontinually and unknowingly streaming tend to burn out; and their constantstreaming may actually not be good for the receiver, may be a burden. Atthe end of the day, a mother who only streams to her kids is exhausted,and the kids may all be on overload because of it.

This is very different from interfacing with the children. When you interface,it doesn't mean that you're less attentive, or love them less - you justhave very clear boundaries. So you're in a better position to see what'sgood for the children, what's good for you.

Meridians: Are there times when streaming energy is appropriateand helpful?

Fritz Smith: Yes. One time to stream energy might be when theother person is in a state of depletion. People who have just had an accident,or fainted, or somehow responded to a situation with a sudden depletionof energy may benefit from having energy streamed into them, in a momentaryway. It's almost like a jump-start. In acupuncture, you can give a temporarylift to someone who's depleted by streaming thought the needle. However- and this is my bias - streaming as a common strategy usually is disadvantageous,and unconscious streaming often leads to depression and chronic depletion.It's important to know what streaming feels like, so if you find yourselfstreaming inappropriately, you can identify it and stop.

There's yet another way of connecting in addition to streaming, blendingand interfacing, and that is...

Meridians: Channeling?

Fritz Smith: Yes. With channeling, energy also passes from oneperson to another. But here, the energy is passing through the giver ratherthan coming from the giver, as with streaming. In streaming, the sourceis our own "energy bank." In channeling, by contrast, we are theconduit from some other source. One problem inherent to channeling is thatif the channeler is not energetically clear in his or her own body, theconducted energy may pick up distortions of the channeler and pass themon to the receiver. The energy that leaves the person may not be as clearas that which entered. To channel reliably, one usually needs to have donea lot of inner work to clear personal fields. Distortion can be a difficulty.

Meridians: Do people sometimes confuse the feelings of energymovement with emotions - say, confuse streaming or blending with the emotionof love?

Fritz Smith: There are many types of love. A person with littleunderstanding of the movement of energy may equate or confuse the feelingof energetic movement with "love" or "being in love."They both feel good. A characteristic of "unconditional" loveis nonattachment. When we stream or blend, we overlap the other person'sboundaries. With this overlap may come a sense of attachment: we've becomepart of the other person's process. If people use blending as a basic strategyof relationship, they run the risk of codependency, of losing their ownperspective.

Let's look at acupuncture for another example of energy movement in relationto emotions. Acupuncture makes a distinction between the emotions of compassionand sympathy. Compassion would be closer to unconditional love and to interface- the energetic position where one person is relating to another, yet isnot necessarily involved in that person's process. With sympathy, on theother hand, one pours emotion or energy into the other person. Appropriatesympathy is fine: but from the acupuncture viewpoint, excess sympathy isseen as a dysfunction.

Meridians: Can interfacing be carried too far - as in the caseof people who never seem to blend with others or stream, who seem neverto give or themselves?

Fritz Smith: I think it's incorrect to say that those who seldomblend or stream are people who don't give of themselves, or are distantand removed. It's fun to blend: yet one can be as friendly and warm throughinterface - can be as soft and approachable - as through blending or streaming.And interface has the advantage of being clear about responsibility withinthe interaction.

When doing acupuncture, bodywork, or other types of therapy, it's myview that interface is the ideal way to relate to the client, because withinterface, the intentions and boundaries between the client and practitionerare clear. And in terms of our social activity, I think these same principlesapply.

To me, the prime example of unconditional love and the practice of interfaceis His Holiness the Dalai Lama. He is the most open, nonjudgmental, compassionatepublic figure I know - he is deeply concerned, yet he seems to have veryclear sense of boundaries. From what I know of him, I would say he is notprone to blend or stream with others.

Meridians: Let's say we could achieve the state of unconditionallove. Would we use different modes of energy as we interacted with people,depending on the circumstances?

Fritz Smith: It's my personal view that the closer we come tounconditional love, the heart chakra, the more we will act without attachment,without comparing or judging ourselves or others. Unconditional love isfree from emotional strings, conditions, rewards, manipulations, or hiddenagendas - conditions that develop when our boundaries are not clear. Accordingto one tradition from India, enlightenment is to "love all, serve all"- no strings attached. To me that represents a path of unconditional love.

Can we, or "should" we always act from this perspective? Ithink in the living of everyday life we need to utilize most forms of energymovement, at one time or another - they all have their strengths. Yet theseare worlds within a wider world. Cultivating the widest perspective of unconditionallove would serve us well - ourselves and all humanity.

Meridians: Going back to working with energy, does it help ifthe receiver knows about, and accepts, these concepts of energy?

Fritz Smith: To work with energy, the therapist - the body worker,the acupuncturist - needs to accept its existence and know how to use it:to benefit from energy, we do not need knowledge of energy theory. In fact,knowing too much may actually interfere if it leads a person to stay inhis or her left brain. Trying to figure out what is being done and trackingthe energy, while receiving a session, may block or alter the natural movementand balance of the energy. And certainly the chances of the person experiencingthe energy movement are greatly reduced.

In my own work of Zero Balancing, I rarely discuss theory as part ofa session, Not only does discussion put people in their left brain, butalso it may come up against different belief systems which further engagesthe cognitive process. I've long been guided by a sign at the Esalen mineralbaths: "Let the warm water flow through an empty mind."

Meridians: What implications does the Vocabulary of Touch havefor acupuncture?

Fritz Smith: The reason this model is important for the acupunctureworld is that all this works through the needle. You put the needle in thepoint, and when you've entered the energy you can interface with it, blendwith it, stream into it, or channel into it - depending on your bias, yourskill and training, and the needs of the patient. What happens through theneedle is much clearer if the acupuncturist has determined, for example:"Through the needle, I want to interface with this person. I want himor her to have the experience of really being in touch with humanity withoutlosing identity. And I'll give that experience by interfacing with his orher energy system for a moment." That can give the patient the experienceof really being recognized as well as connected. The next patient will havea different need, of course, and therefore a different scenario.

If you know this vocabulary, you can refine the quality of your acupuncture,because through your needle you can do much more than tonify, sedate, ortransfer the energy. You can fine-tune your needling. You can tonify, forexample, from interface or blending or streaming. You have additional ways- and more precise ways - of working through the needle. It's a matter ofyour style and skill, and the patient's need.

Meridians: I have a question about streaming. Isn't it drainingfor practitioners to stream their energy through the needle? Would it bebetter to think of channeling energy to another person instead of streaming?When people are trained in therapeutic touch, they're often told to thinkof channeling energy from a source beyond themselves rather than streamingit from their own "energy bank."

Fritz Smith: I think there's a real possibility of acupuncturistsbeing drained when they stream through the needle, as anyone can be drainedwho streams too much. I would say that channeling has some advantages hereover streaming. However, as I indicated earlier, it's not quite that simple.First is the issue, what are you going to channel. Second, according tomy understanding of physics of energy, when we channel energy, a siphoneffect occurs - as energy passes through a body, it may pick up the vibrationof unresolved or chaotic issues within the tissues. So the energy that leavesus may be different from the energy that entered us. If the practitioneror "channeler" is not clear - has many unresolved energy vortices,has not cleared personal history, or has a lot of internal prejudice - thisunresolved material may come out in the channeled energy or the channeledinformation.

Therefore, in the therapeutic context, I would still rather come frominterface, thinking in terms of stimulating the person's own energy or engagingtheir own internal world, rather than adding to it from an outside source.

Meridians: Sometimes it feels as if people are pulling energyfrom you - forcing you to stream. What's a good way to respond in this situation?

Fritz Smith: In my practice I've developed a number of ways towork in such circumstances, the most important being interface. I may alsobe a bit more formal in my persona, more the "doctor" than thefriend, and take more responsibility for the subject matter of the conversation,so it doesn't needlessly drift into areas of emotion inherently prone tostreaming - areas such as deep sympathy or grief. In more extreme cases,I directly shield myself with a buffer of vibration.

Meridians: How can we help people in everyday situations, usingthis model? For instance, how could we use the vocabulary of touch in relatingto somebody who's very sad or grieving? Or to my teenager who's really madat me?

Fritz Smith: I'd like to summarize the distinctions before answeringthe question. First, we're assuming that energy exists, that vibration isone characteristic of energy, and that any emotion - anger, sadness, fear,and so on - has a unique vibratory pattern that is archetypal for that emotion.Secondly, this model assumes that emotions and thoughts, as vibration, canbe held within our tissue. These held vibrations are like vortices of energyin the ocean; and like an ocean vortex, these vibrations stay in form inour tissues for long periods of time. The third assumption is that elementsof the vocabulary of touch - interface, blending, streaming and channeling- are ways of interacting with energy.

Now to the question. Let's assume that a person is agitated, hyperactive,or borderline hysterical, meaning that the vibration in the body is in excess.It is too rapid, too fast, too amplified. In this case, the therapist -or friend or parent - would want to quiet the vibration in the person'sbody.

If you were to quiet hyperactive energy with touch, you could do it throughblending, streaming, or interface. Again, I would choose to work from interface.I would make quieting movements on the person - pressing down, containing,holding, comforting. I'd make any type of physical motion in my hands thatwould help quiet the vibration.

If someone is chronically depressed, however, the energetic movementwould be to increase the vibration, to stimulate, to enliven that person.Again, this can be done through any of the modes.

How one approaches the emotional body of another person is a matter ofstyle and experience. I know very excellent therapists who work throughblending and do very good work and get very good results. My personal experienceleads me to interface because it has fewer built-in problems for me thandoes blending. But for someone else, that may not be true. In understandingthe vocabulary of touch, each person can find what works best for him orher in various situations. Just knowing possibilities is the beginning ofthe exploration.

Meridians: Would you say more about a layperson using this "vocabulary'in their relationships with others?

Fritz Smith: We've already talked about some of the guidelinesfor this "vocabulary" - how relating through interface keeps boundariesclear, yet can be warm and supportive. How a brief period of streaming cangive a depleted person a "jump-start." How blending can bringa sense of community and sharing on a deep level. How channeling can bringa "breath of fresh air."

So people who know these possibilities can observe how they're interactingwith others, and then choose how they use their energy in relationships.

I teach a lot, and often I see two light bulbs go on in people - one,when they understand they have a choice of interfacing, blending, streamingor channeling and two, when they realize they have unconscious habitualpatterns. They suddenly see themselves: "Why, I've been streaming intomy children all this time!" Once they see the possibilities, they beginto change.

When people find they have a choice and use it consciously, they're oftenamazed at what follows.

This article appeared in Meridians
published by Traditional Acupuncture Institute
Summer 1995 edition.